Lieutenant Dan, you got new feet!

No, I didn't cancel the pedicure appointment. This was the first pedicure I have had and what a treat it was. I thought for sure I would have a hard time having someone handle my feet as I'm extremely ticklish. There was only a couple of times that I had to pull my foot away with a giggle. She scrubbed, soaked, buffed, massaged and cleaned up these old toeses and the nails are now a sparkly sunset orange. I found myself walking along and admiring my new feet. It reminded me of the line from the movie Forest Gump; "Lieutenant Dan, you got new legs!" Maybe that's what all those people are doing when they're walking along with their heads down - not looking at the ground to avoid eye contact but perhaps admiring their freshly pedicured toes?

And of course, because it's me and I'm a klutz, I smudged one of the nails before I got home. I walked in the house and fixed it with a drop of polish I had that is close in color, walk outside and immediately one of the cats steps right on that toe and smudges it again! I'll wait until later to fix it. My feet are now ready for the reunion! Now for the rest of me...argh!

My Three for today:
1. The humidity went away and it's a beautiful day!
2. Laughing with my sister.
3. Hearing an old friends voice again.

Reconnecting

I know I kind of suddenly disappeared. All is fine. I just took a hiatus from the blog world for a bit. Have been getting the urge to start writing again so here we go.

This weekend is my 25th high school class reunion. I haven't been to one since the 5th. And up until last fall, I hadn't come across any of my classmates for about 15 years. I'm excited and nervous all at the same time. Not sure why. Is it an unavoidable feeling to want to prove yourself "worthy" to former classmates? Why am I so nervous? I'm going to have fun regardless of my worries.

Maybe my old extreme "worry about what others think" characteristic is coming out again. I was really bad about that for a long time. The hubby has been a good influence on me in that department. Eventually I decided I was tired of him having all the fun and me getting embarrased all the time. It still comes out now and then but hubby and turning 40 has helped me get past it. So why is it rearing it's ugly head again? Maybe I'll cancel my pedicure on Thursday just to be defiant.
No I won't!


Three Things I'm Happy About:
1. I'm glad my nieces are now aunts and can feel how much I love them.
2. I'm thankful my brothers illness didn't turn serious.
3. I'm happy our kitty Burn came home last night after being gone for 2 days.

Lilacs

Our driveway is lined with lilac bushes and they went into full bloom this week. The smell is absolutely marvelous. This is the second spring since quitting smoking and this spring have realized what I've been missing all these years. As a smoker, my olfactory sensors were so numbed I'd have to stick my nose in the flowers to smell them or occasionally I'd catch a whiff of them in the air. This year, I step outside and their perfume permeates everything. It's wonderful! Last night was pure heaven falling asleep to a cool breeze fluttering the window curtains, the sounds of a distant chorus of frogs and the smell of lilacs filling my dreams.

I Will Never Be Unemployable

I know this because if the guy I spoke with on the phone can work at Target, I am sure I will be able to don the red shirt of Target.

My usual source of ink cartridges went out of business. I had called the closest Target store and asked if they carried Epson ink cartridges and sure enough, they do. I went to the store only to find they were out of two of the five colors I need to complete a set. I asked where the next nearest Target was and was told Oakdale; another 20 minutes down the road. I called the Oakdale store to make sure they had my missing colors before I ventured further down the road with $3.10/gallon gasoline in the tank. I was transferred to the computer department. The conversation went as follows:

(TTG=Teenage Target Guy)

TTG: (with slight surfer dude accent) Hello, how can I help you?

Balou: I was just at the Hudson Target store and they are missing two colors of the Epson ink cartridges I need. I am calling to make sure you have what I need before I drive there.

TTG: We have Epson ink cartridges.

Balou: Could you check and make sure you have all 5 colors for the R300 printer?

TTG: Ummm, R300?

Balou: Yes. R300 is the type of Epson Stylus printer. It is printed on the box.

TTG: Ummm.

Balou: There is a picture of a guitar on the front.

TTG: (excitedly) Oh! Yaww! We have the guitar one.

Balou: Do you have the Light Cyan and Magenta available?

TTG: Yaww, we have those.

Balou: OK, thanks. I'm coming from Hudson. I know I need to go north on I-694 but what exit do I take?

TTG: Take Hwy 5.

Balou: Are you on the east or west side of the freeway?

(After a long pause...)

TTG: Umm. Which side does the sun come up again?

Balou: bwaaa haaa haaa haa ha hahaha ho ho ho hummm um. Are you serious?

(I can hear him asking a co-worker "Dude, are we east or west of the freeway?")

TTG: Yaww, it's the east side.

Balou: Thank you.


So, what side of the freeway does the sun come up in your neck of the woods?

Forgetfullness - Billy Collins

US Poet Laureate Billy Collins reads his poem "Forgetfulness"

with animation by Julian Grey of Headgear.

Foreign Particle Etiquette

I was reliving an embarrassing moment I had a while back. I used to sell handmade greeting cards at a very chic/whimsical art gallery. The woman that owns the gallery is personable but intimidating at the same time and always made me nervous when speaking with her.

I was on my way to drop off some cards and was running late so stopped at the fast food drive through and picked up a sandwich for lunch. It was some chicken concoction with mayo and shredded lettuce. I walked into the gallery and talked with the owner for a spell after handing her my cards. Me, nervous as ever and she was looking at me a bit funny. I get out to the car, look in the mirror and there's a blob of lettuce and mayo on the side of my face. It had taken on a mucous-like quality from the heat of my blushing cheek.

I was embarrassed beyond belief which turned to frustration at her lack of common courtesy. Why didn't she say something? All it would've taken is handing me a Kleenex and a hushed "Here, there's a little something on your right cheek."

If someone I know has some mustard or other foreign object on their face, I discreetly let them know. I think it's common courtesy. For myself, I usually look at myself in the rear-view mirror before I get out of the car and perform routine foreign particle checks.

The Hasselhoff*

Have you been missing the Hasselhoff? It's OK. You can admit it here. We're all friends. Well, here's your cure. Enjoy. And if you're anything like me, you'll spend the next hour scraping your jaw off the floor and trying to get the "what the hell" look off of your face.


Did you hear the dog bark track plugged in every once in a while? Go back and listen again. I dare you.


LOL @ a Hot Cup of Hoffee! And is it just me or does he have a little man boobie action going on? Sorry, I digress.



No need to thank me. I can feel the love. Warm, fuzzy puppy love.

*Please direct all Post Traumatic Stress Disorder or burned retina lawsuit claims to the Hasselhoff. Born-a-girl is exempt from all legal action heretoforeafterhithertotoo.

Banksy

He has been called an art terrorist, a guerrilla artist, and sometimes a criminal. Banksy, from Bristol in the UK, is a secretive grafitti artist made popular by his provocative creations. Banksy images sometimes contain poignant messages with a twist of humor and sometimes they are just a bit of good old British wit. His artwork is varied and includes more than the stenciled and painted installations found around London...

• In September of 2006 he secretly placed a black hooded, orange jumpsuit clad figure of a Guantanamo Bay detainee on the grounds of Disneyworld in Los Angeles. Placed within the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad ride, it stayed for 90 minutes before the ride was stopped and it was removed. more


• Also in September of 2006, Banksy replaced 500 of Paris Hilton's debut CD's with his own remixes with titles such as "Why am I Famous?", "What Am I For?" and "What Have I Done?". The CD's were switched out in several record shops across the UK with their original barcode in place so they could be purchased without realizing the change had been made. He also replaced the CD cover artwork with that of a woman with a dog's head. more

• In the July of 2005 Banksy created nine paintings on the Palestinian side of Israel's West Bank 425 mile long concrete barrier wall. The images speak for themselves. more


• In March, 2005 he smuggled his creations into four highly guarded New York museums and hung his own paintings in each. Some artwork went undetected for days. Banksy was quoted as saying "Obviously, they've got their eye a lot more on things leaving than things going in, which works in my favour." more


• And just this week an original piece of Banksy artwork fetched a record breaking £288,000 ($500,000+ US). This final price was 20 times the estimated auction value and was paid by a telephone bidder from the U.S. The piece, titled "Space Girl and Bird" is painted on a piece of steel and was commissioned by the band "Blur" for their "Think Tank" album cover. more




Here are a few of my favorites from Banksy's website...

Ask The Shuffle

I found this meme on Snav's World. What a fun one!

Turn on iTunes, your Ipod or Mp3 Player, set it to shuffle, ask the question and hit next song...

How does the world see me?
Milk & Honey - Beck

Will I have a happy life?
Picture This - Jim Brickman

What’s going to happen next?
Crazy - Gnarls Barkley

What do my friends really think of me?
I'm Satisfied - Mississippi John Hurt

Do people secretly lust after me?
Tutti Frutti - Little Richard

How can I make myself happy?
Welcome To Paradise - The Yard Dogs

What should I do with my life?
The Roller Skate Song - Janis Joplin

Will I have more children?
Dum Diddly - The Black Eyed Peas

What is some good advice for me?
Groovin' Hard - The Buddy Rich Big Band

How will I be remembered?
Working Class Hero - John Lennon

What is my signature song?
Sittin On The Dock Of The Bay - Otis Redding

What do I think my signature song is?
This Flight Tonight - Joni Mitchell

What does everyone else think my signature song is?
Metaphor - Delerium

What song will play at my funeral?
Super Trouper - ABBA

What type of boys do I like?
Bedbugs - Squirrel Nut Zippers

What is my day going to be like?
Push - Smashmouth

Give Me A Sign

Hubby has been missing balou. Even though he knew I was not posting for a few days, he said he still checked in twice a day...just in case. Awww. He wuvs me.

The snow is gone, the temperature is rising and beginning to warm the cold ground. Last weekend I washed all the throw rugs in the house and hung them on the clothes line. Thus begins the spring cleaning. This year I feel like purging. I need to reduce the clutter and so decided to have a garage sale. Our dining room has become the collection point and is brimming with unnecessary things.



It is amazing the little things that get moved around and stored "just in case." I might need six calculators some day. I might need four ziploc bags of sea shells. I really might need twin sized bedding - especially since we no longer have a twin bed. I do need some garage sale signs. I think the chain wielding Fabio version would attract some attention, don't you? Is it just me or does anyone else think Fabio looks like a woman from the waist down?